Checking In

Taking the pieces
And making them one;
Repairing,
Transitioning,
Repeating.

The cyclical pattern
Of all my anxiety
Rests calmly when I
Cast them on You.

Coming to know all the
Important entities of
Life and love and
Who You are.

And I still fret about
Tomorrow,
About the unknown
And the uncomfortable...

Adventurous as I am
I hesitate to let go,
To climb forward,
To change.

Checking out to fix it
All in isolation,
Where I make no sense
Of anything;

And I now choose to
Check back in
And untangle the ugly
Process of being solitary.

Renewing,
Embracing,
Sharing,
Being.

And thanking.

Mon Meilleur Ami (My Best Friend)

I have to thank my grandparents for suggesting I watch the French film Le Valet, because it introduced me to the two actors in this charming (that's right, charming) French movie Mon Meilleur Ami. The sentiment is reminiscent of Nick Hornby's About a Boy, as it explores the loneliness of isolation and the joy of finding community.

Francois, a successful art dealer takes a bet suggested by his partner that he must introduce her to his best friend in ten days. He essentially has no friends, and can't even connect to his own daughter or girlfriend in any real way. He meets a sociable cab driver whom he pays to teach him how to interact with people. As you might imagine, the two become friends. However, the plot takes a turn when Francois uses Bruno to win the bet and the two part ways in the wake of betrayal. (Don't worry, there's a happy ending.)

It just got me thinking about our basic need for friendship. Nothing too spectacular or profound, just how we need to connect to one another. Bruno tells Francois at one point that a friend will go the limit, but he can only understand that in monetary terms. He has the hardest time just having a conversation, or meeting with someone without a business reason. Friendship is sometimes frivolous, and it should be. It's also comforting and redeeming and all those things we can't always find in ourselves.

Like I said, nothing spectacular, just a good reminder of something so basic it's easy to forget.

Twenty-Seven

I started writing a really self-reflective post about getting older and being young, but instead I decided to cite some random things I have observed/experienced in the past few days. This randomness makes me love my neighborhood and school even more:

* In Third Ward, a man on a pedicab (you know, like a bicycle rickshaw) with a sign on the back that read "Tour de Hood"

* One of my women's studies students expressing her interest in becoming a trial lawyer at 80 for the express purpose of beating up on young, male lawyers in the courtroom

* Walking my fiancee's dog to the video store and letting her run around inside the store without a leash

* A woman brushing her teeth at the bus stop

* Showing the new IT girl the jock strap chandelier in my office


I wish I was creative enough to come up with this stuff on my own! It's a good thing my life holds so much inspiration.